Chiiiile, Please!

Yesss, chile — we are moving smooth and steady! 💥

Let’s just say it out loud, chile: dating without discernment is how you end up tired, tangled, and asking God, “Whewww, why do I keep picking these fools?”

Here’s the raw truth: not everyone deserves access to you. Not everyone deserves to know your dreams, your body, your story, your heart. Not everyone is meant to walk beside you — some people are just meant to pass by. And the reason so many of us are burned out in love is because we are handing out VIP passes to people who haven’t even earned general admission. 💥

We date on vibes instead of values. We ignore the pit in our stomach and call it “giving someone a chance.” We see red flags and call them “potential.” And then we wonder why we’re emotionally bankrupt, spiritually drained, and questioning our own worth. But here’s the thing: discernment isn’t judgment — it’s wisdom.

Dating with discernment means you move slow enough to see people. To watch how they handle “no.” To notice how they talk about others when they think it doesn’t matter. To ask yourself, Does this person align with my vision — or just excite my ego?

It means you stop dating for potential and start dating for pattern. Chile, let me say that again for the ones in the back: potential doesn’t matter if the pattern is trash. I don’t care how sweet they can be on a good day if their everyday is inconsistent, immature, and irresponsible.

Discernment also means checking yourself. Are you dating because you’re ready, or because you’re lonely? Are you holding onto hope or holding onto someone who’s only half-invested? Are you setting standards or issuing ultimatums you never enforce?

Here’s what I know from the coach’s seat: the people who date with discernment have fewer heartbreaks, not because they avoid love, but because they filter wisely. They ask questions early. They walk away when the energy is off. They don’t call it “commitment” when it’s actually just clinging. They hold space for real love but don’t fill the void with whoever’s available.

So if you want to date in this season — date slow. Date curious. Date prayerfully, intentionally, bravely. Don’t hand your softness to people who only want access to your body but not your becoming. Don’t apologize for asking hard questions or walking away when the answers aren’t what you need.

Because the truth is, you are the prize. But more than that — you are the chooser. You are the gatekeeper to your peace, your purpose, your time, your joy. And chile, when you date with discernment, you stop seeing rejection as loss and start seeing it as divine redirection.

Tonight, I want you to check yourself lovingly. Are you picking people who align with your future, or just your present loneliness? Are you dating with discernment, or are you just hoping you’ll be the exception to their inconsistency?

Trust me, baby — when you stop handing out free passes, the quality of who approaches you will shift.

With wisdom, edge, and unapologetic love,
[Your Name]
@ProvokeChange
Chiiiile Please Blog